Feeling like a fraud?

Share on FacebookShare on Google+Tweet about this on TwitterShare on LinkedInPin on PinterestEmail this to someone

SUMMARY

If you’ve ever thought to yourself, “One of these days people will realize I don’t know as much as they think,” then I hope you will make the most of the following points!

Point no. 1: remember your reasons why!

There is always a BIG reason why you initiated any major change or achievement in your life and this is what you need to remind yourself on a daily basis in order to keep yourself motivated and inspired to thrive professionally, personally, etc. So when in doubt, go back to this big reason!

 

Point no.2: Focus on providing value

Usually people feel like a fraud when they are concerned only about themselves! The fastest way to get over feeling like a fraud is to genuinely try to help someone else. Contribution is the fastest way of putting things into perspective again, as you are no longer interested only in meeting your needs, but instead you are focusing on offering and genuinely supporting other people too!

 

Point no. 3: Keep a file of people saying nice things about you

Every time someone says a positive comment about you, write it down and put it in a folder. That way, whenever you are in doubt, and you can’t think of any good reason why people like you, you will have plenty of examples to go through.

 

Point no.4: Stop comparing yourself to other people

In your eyes, there might never be a good reason why you have been chosen to do what it is that you are currently doing! If you compare yourself to other people all the time, it’s very easy to fall into the trap of “my life sucks compared to that life”. Live to your best, stop comparing and start respecting your own experiences.

And remember: we all share the same challenges. As long as we share and learn from each, the better the quality of our lives is going to be. See you next time!

 

FULL TRANSCRIPT:

Hi, I’m Eva Lychrou and I’m a Greek psychotherapist and coach in London.

Do you ever start questioning everything you’re creating, everything you’re working on and everything you’re working towards? Do you sometimes question what other people, such as your colleagues, boss, partners see in you?

If so, you will relate with Tania’s story as she shares:

Hello Eva! Thank you for constantly being a source of inspiration and positivity! I wish I could say the same about me too… A couple of years ago I made a conscious decision to move to Berlin, in an attempt to take my career to the next level. Although I have been successful at that, there have been quite a few days when I don’t see any value in the work that I’m doing, I constantly underestimate my worth and my contribution. Although I have been getting great feedback from my manager and everyone around me, my perspective is very different! Is there any way I can stop putting myself down and realise my true worth at work? Thank you, Tania

Tania, thank you for bringing up such a common issue! Let me tell you that I have rarely met anyone who has not been through what you are currently facing. So let me share with you some very valuable points for you to remember whenever you are going through such a doubtful state of mind.

 

Point no. 1: remember your reasons why!

As you have already mentioned in your email, there was a strong reason why you decided to move to Berlin! There was a BIG reason why you initiated this career change and this is what you need to remind yourself on a daily basis in order to keep yourself motivated and inspired to thrive professionally, despite anything else! This is a COMMITMENT you made with yourself, and it is all you need to remind yourself whenever you are having a bad day, or you don’t see what other people see in you etc. So when in doubt, go back to this big reason!

 

Point no.2: Focus on providing value

Usually people feel like a fraud when they are concerned only about themselves.

What will other people think of me? If I fail, they will realise that I wasn’t worth it. I don’t know as much as my colleagues, I have no right to say anything on this topic”…

Blah blah blah…

The fastest way to get over feeling like a fraud is to genuinely try to help someone else. Contribution is the fastest way of putting things into perspective again, as you are no longer interested only in meeting your needs, but instead you are focusing on offering and genuinely supporting other people too!

 

Point no. 3: Keep a file of people saying nice things about you

Just like I collect testimonials from my clients, as a way of ensuring my best possible practice, I equally invite my clients to do the same. That is, every time someone says a positive comment about you, write it down and put it in a folder! That way, whenever you are in doubt, and you can’t think of any good reason why people like you, you will have plenty of examples to go through.

Collect your wins, testimonials, positive feedback, whatever that is, and then visit them when in need!

 

Point no.4: Stop comparing yourself to other people.

In your eyes, there might never be a good reason why you have been chosen to do what it is that you are currently doing. Similarly, if I get to compare myself with other very successful personal development figures, such as Tony Robbins, there is no good reason why people would want to hear what I had to say! Yet I’m still showing up everyday for my clients and for the people that I get to inspire through my videos because I think I have something to offer! If I compare myself to these other figures it’s very easy to fall into the trap of “my life sucks compared to that life”.

But you need to respect and cherish the fact that you aren’t here to live the life of another person. Live to your best, stop comparing and start respecting your own experiences. You are not a failure, you’re just you.

Before I wrap this up, here’s a tweet for you to share:

imposter tweet

 

Tania, I want you to remember to keep doing an awesome job, keep doing your best and practice being your own source of validation!

Now I would love to hear from you.

What is the one thing you have avoided because you felt like a failure?

Let me know in the comments below.

As always, sign up to receive updates from me at evalychrou.com and don’t forget to share this video with your friends.

And remember: we all share the same challenges. As long as we share and learn from each, the better the quality of our lives is going to be.

See you next time!

 

 

 

No comments yet.

Leave a Comment

Remember to play nicely folks, nobody likes a troll.