How do you deal with business input from your partner?

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SUMMARY:

In today’s episode, you will learn four ways you can balance between listening to your own instinct and other people’s feedback regarding your own business.

Point no. 1: monitor yourself

Observe the kind of messages you might be sending out to your husband. Check how often during the week you might be asking directly or indirectly for his feedback.  Try to be very honest with yourself before you reply.

 

Point no. 2: be clear on what you need

Before you start having any discussion with your husband it might be useful to pre-set the stage. So for example, depending on how you feel, you might need to let him know that you might need his advice this time around, or that you might only need a sympathetic ear and nothing else.  

 

Point no. 3: use the feedback constructively

I would encourage you to try to understand what it is that might be getting in the way with your husband’s feedback. Usually when we get upset over some comment, it is because there might be an element of truth in it.

 

Point no. 4: get a mentor from the same industry

It would be wise to hire a mentor with whom you could share all your troubles and worries about your business, without ultimately jeopardising your intimate relationship.

FULL TRANSCRIPT:

Hi, this is Eva Lychrou and I’m a Greek psychotherapist and coach in London. Today’s topic is huge, especially if you are starting out or already have your own business and you don’t know what to do when it comes to input advise from your partner. Let me quickly share with you Hara’s question so that you get a picture!

Hi eva, thank you for the great input! My name is Hara and I have been married three years now to a wonderful man.  My husband runs very successfully a family business for the last 10 years. I have recently started out my business in accounting and quite often other people but especially my husband have tried to give me advice on how I should do things. The problem is that although I really appreciate his feedback, sometimes I get so frustrated, I just can’t stand the man!

How can I balance between listening and following what my instinct says and not offend my husband by not doing what he says? What do you think I should do?

Looking forward to your reply, thank you Hara”

 

Hara thank you for a great question! I have to say that I’ve had the same confusion when I first started out building my practice in London so I can really feel for you!

So let me quickly suggest some points for you to consider next time you find yourself struggling what position to take.

 

Point no. 1: monitor yourself

I would encourage you to sit down and observe the kind of messages you might be sending out to your husband. Check how often during the week you might be asking directly or indirectly for his feedback.

For example, do you find yourself talking about your business problems with him while having dinner? Or do you find yourself being upset about work, so eventually your husband might be getting the signal that he needs to step in to your rescue?

Try to be very honest with yourself before you reply.

 

Point no. 2: be clear on what you need

I sincerely understand you wanting to do things on your own and at the same time get occasionally some advice from your man; especially if he is very successful at what he does! However, you need to be clear every time what you might need from him.

So before you start having any discussion with your husband it might be useful to pre-set the stage. So for example, depending on how you feel, you might need to let him know that you might need his advice this time around, or that you might only need a sympathetic ear and nothing else.

That way, you will have empowered both yourself and your husband to take a clear stance about it, you no longer need to feel torn or weak, and your husband will know in advance what would be the best way for him to respond.

 

Point no. 3: use the feedback constructively

I would encourage you to try to understand what it is that might be getting in the way with your husband’s feedback. The reason why I’m saying that is because it seems to me that your husband is very successful at what he does, and it could very possibly be that you are missing out from his experience and wisdom. Therefore I would encourage you to sit down and ask yourself what it is that makes you feel defensive towards his comments.

Usually when we get upset over some comment, it is because there might be an element of truth in it. Try to use this feedback in a more productive way so that both you and your business can grow out of it.

 

Point no. 4: get a mentor from the same industry

If after having tried out the above mentioned points, you still find yourself not feeling good with yourself, or you might still get defensive towards your husband’s suggestions, maybe it would be wise to hire a mentor with whom you could share all your troubles and worries about your business, without ultimately jeopardising your intimate relationship. Make sure that this mentor comes from the same industry as yours, so that you can relate more easily to one another. That way you enjoy your relationship with your husband and your relationship towards your business.

 

Before I wrap this up, here is a tweet for you to share:

 

biz advice tweet eng

Hara these were my suggestions to you. I hope you find them helpful!

As always I would love to hear from you.

Do you take business advice from your partner? If so, have your got any relevant tips to share?

Let me know in the comments below.

Sign up to receive updates from me at evalychrou.com and don’t forget to share this video with your friends.

And remember: we all share the same challenges. As long as we share and learn from each other, the better the quality of our lives is going to be!

 

 

 

 

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